I Think I Want A Banana

Who the hell approved this? I love Pink Floyd. I love bananas. But Pink Floyd in my bananas (or is it bananas in my Pink Floyd)? Well, that’s just nonsense.

Happy Berfday!

After 11 years (and 9 months) of waiting, our very own bundle of joy has arrived. At 7:51 this morning Jude Mathis joined our family. At 6 lbs. 12 oz. and 19″ long, he is perfect. Ten fingers, ten toes, two eyes, two ears, two noses…wait, scratch that. There’s only one nose.
I will admit that I don’t think I have ever cried that much so quickly. We hadn’t even seen him, one of the nurses said, “Theres his foot,” and Kristy and I turned into blubbering messes. I nearly drowned in my own tears and snot.
Well, I’m keeping this post short, because I’ve been up since 3 a.m. and we are exhaZzzZzz…

Playing it cool.

I’m sure he meant to do that.

Nonsense from the Desk 2/7/12

Much like the rest of this blog.

Brace yourselves…

Easter is coming.

Nonsense from the desk 1/26/12

That’s it! Now the gloves are coming off!

Just Another Hole In The Head

During a period of life when the average teenager believes that their parents are stupid, it seems a bit ironic that the teen years are when we make the stupidest choices. Sometimes of our lives.

At this stage of my life I am the parent of, not 1, not 2, but 3 teenagers. And within the next 2 years that number will increase to 5 teens. Five of them! Under one roof! I am truly insane. My teens are no different than the average teen these days. You know what I’m talking about. Mom is an overprotective basket case and dad’s, well, dad is just stupid, despite the fact that he has survived his own teen years.

Let me share a couple of examples. My oldest son (16) decided he needed another hole in his head. Sadly, this is not the first time that he decided to pierce his lip. With a straight pin. And no ring to put in it. But here’s the best part, he wrote a note to another student and informed them that his dad (me) took him to get his lip pierced for his birthday and to not to tell his mom because it was a father/son bonding thing. Fortunately, the note was brought to the attention of his mother, my wife, and we’ve come to the conclusion that my wife’s students know me better than my own son. When my son told one of his closest friends about the “piercing” and the story behind it, his friend just shook his head in disbelief. He knew that I would never do that.

Then there was the time that we got a call from our son on his cell phone, from the school where he is not allowed to have a cell phone. And he could not figure out how we knew.

Our teenage daughter, who is convinced, at least every other day, that we are ruining her life, decided on one such day that she would walk to school. Six miles away. Besides the fact that an irrational 13 year old girl should not be walking across town during one of the busiest traffic times of the day, the only thing that would have made it more ridiculous is if it was snowing and uphill all the way.

Let’s not forget my oldest son’s latest exploit: vandalism. I thought for sure by 16, that type of stuff would be out of his system. Especially considering he has never done it before. The stupid part though, leaving out the illegal aspect of the act, was what he wrote. It wasn’t “I was here” or “Kilroy was here” or “Metallica rules”(they do, by the way). No, my son, and his criminal cohort, wrote…wait for it…”BOOBS.” Boobs on a busy neighborhood street. In the middle of the day. Across the street from the home of the local police chief. Do I need to go on?

These are probably not life altering decisions. However, they are examples of what may be to come. Consider this, when asked this question on a test “Did john baptize Jesus by sprinkling or immersion?” my son answered, “Jesus got baptized by a man named ‘immersion’.”

I think it’s time to start worrying.